Dirty Pretty Things: Fashion Crimes

How to Look Like You've Dressed in the Dark...

I know, I know...you think you're fabulous.
And you will always find someone else who will tell you that you are because they are desperately trying to be in your circle of friends. Examples: Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears...

There's just one thing...You look like you dress in the dark and your idea of fashion should be no where near the pages of Vogue.

Let us today use Chloe Sevigny as our example. Chloe recently designed a collection for a line called "Opening Ceremony". Think: Laura Ashley meets Esther Williams meets 80's and 90's fashion faux pas, seriously.

First of all, allowing a girl who can't dress herself to "design" clothing for other people is just wrong. That's like asking Britney to watch your children.

Secondly, the pieces aren't unlike what you might find in those cheapy stores such as Rainbow Shops or Fashion Bug, etc, ...in the 90's! I suppose they thought that if they threw it together and took terrible, badly lit, blurry photos, people would think that they had a pulse of what is fashion forward. Sorry. It's just a horrible horrible crime against...well, fashion...and photography.

Here's a [bad] taste of what you could look like this Spring...

So, take note of what you've just witnessed...ALWAYS dress with a light on and spot check yourself in the mirror before you leave the house. If your clothes look like something that Chloe, Bai Ling or Phoebe Price might wear, go and change...Quickly!